When someone comes to you and tells you they are in an abusive relationship, our first job, always, is to…BELIEVE them.
If a woman is in an abusive relationship, it has likely taken her a very long time to define what is wrong at home. She has been distraught and alone and ashamed of her circumstances. She has been made to feel like everything is her fault, and at times, she has believed his lies.
Her conscience tells her every day,
“get out! leave! it’s not you! He has a serious problem, and you can’t fix him.”
But, out of love for the man, her husband, she has labored long before coming to talk to you. When she comes, don’t be an obstacle in her path, she has already forded many obstacles and taken a huge risk in telling you, her story.
If you really do call yourself, her friend,
10 Things you Must Do To Help a friend In An Abusive Relationship
2-Hug her and tell her you are sorry for her suffering
3-Listen to her, and let her cry-She has lost hopes/dreams and so much more about her identity.
4-Ask her what she wants to do
5-Tell her that love does not hurt, and if he is hurting her, he DOES NOT LOVE HER, and has already broken the marriage covenant and vows. Leaving him, will not be ‘her’ breaking covenant, it is already done by his abuse.
6-Tell her YOU WILL HELP HER
7-Help her make an escape plan
8-Help her find a place of refuge he will not think of
9-Help her escape with all that she believes she needs
10-Stand by her, and see it through with her, to the end, and still be her friend, once she is divorced from her abuser.
For more resources to help you in helping your friend, caught in an abusive relationship,